Tag: the gory bits

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If I only had a brain

The problem with brains is that they’re soft.  Really soft.  So soft that the crash helmet that is your skull isn’t even enough to protect it from a decent knock to the head.  If nature can’t solve a problem then I don’t expect that I can.

The problem with scientists is that they want their brain specimens in as close to perfect condition as possible to dissect them.

The problem with abattoirs is that they are in an incredibly competitive industry with tight margins and food standards criteria that put a lot of demand on their workers to meet targets that most of us couldn’t cope with.

When those three problems collide this is what you get:

bucket o' lambs brains

The demand for brains at the beginning of this term has been stronger than we’ve ever seen before.  Sadly, the quality of the brains that has been delivered has been the worst we’ve ever seen.  This is a combination of the industry having to catch up and deliver whatever they’ve got in the aftermath of the natural disasters we’ve all experienced this summer and the person whose job it is to get that brain out into that punnet not being too particular about the final product.

Lucky for you I am here to defrost them, sort them and repackage them so this is what you get:

6 pack of lambs brains

Over the past few weeks we have sorted hundreds of punnets of brains with about 50% of them being good enough to package up like this.  At this stage we have no information that supply is going to be affected by the floods and cyclones, however I would be very surprised if it wasn’t.  I really think that there is probably going to have been significant stock losses that haven’t been assessed yet.

Here are a few tips to give yourself the best chance of delivering a really good specimen to your classes:

  1. give us as much notice as you possibly can that you are going to have brains in your order
  2. defrost them slowly in the fridge and be very careful when you handle them
  3. prepare the brains by soaking them in 20% methylated spirits for up to 48hrs before the class to give them a bit firmer texture

If you’ve got a tip about brains that will make a Labbies life easier then please let us know.  It would be great to be able to publish a series of tried and true hints and tips on dissection written by the people who know best.

Miss Vivi

Feb 8, 2011

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Both plucks have been exceptional!

Both plucks have been exceptional!  I commented to the Biology teacher, just this morning:  They are the best kidneys I’ve seen in twenty years of dissections.  The kidneys they gave us at Uni to dissect weren’t as good as today’s.

I would highly recommend the specialised services of Dissection Connection to ANY teaching institution.  I much appreciated their prompt delivery and handling too!!!!

– Geoffrey Hampton, Varsity College

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I think you’ve got yourself a long term customer

Hi Miss Vivi J

Just received our first order – arrived in perfect condition and frozen solid, such a delightful change.  I think you’ve got yourself a long term customer.

Thanks again – I love the service – wish you had been around 5 years ago!
Hope you have a business plan that can cope with strong growth 🙂

– Dr Bill Suthers, Toowoomba

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We have already done more dissections this year than ever before

We have already done more dissections this year than ever before, especially Year 10 and senior biology (this is our very first Year 12 cohort) and it has been SO much easier than before by using Dissection Connection. It used to take (waste) hours of work time, as well as my own time, trying to source and collect suitable specimens and have them available when the teachers wanted them. There were often delays followed by disappointment if the specimens weren’t all that useful.
Now I get the teachers to give me a full list so I can order the whole term’s worth at the start of the term. They arrive promptly, frozen solid and in excellent condition, so I can just leave them in the freezer ready for action at any time a teacher decides to use them…it’s brilliant!  The only thing I needed to think about was making sure we have enough freezer space. I’m not being paid to advertise or anything but I certainly recommend them if you don’t already have a good supplier.
Signed…Happy Customer 🙂

PS An added bonus here on the Sunny Coast is the “delivery with a smile” from Peter. I’ve never actually been around to meet him when he delivers but the office ladies say he brightens their day…and they are always surprisingly enthusiastic when I tell them to expect delivery of some animal body parts that day!

– Sue Lobegeiger, Unity College Caloundra